As you may know, I was disinvited from delivering a college commencement address after some students objected to a book I wrote 20 years ago in the shadow of 9/11.
You can read the full background story here.
Here’s the abridged version of what I would have said to the Class of 2024:
First, congratulations.
COVID robbed you of pomp and circumstance when you were in high school… and now the tumult of college campus protests has denied some of an orderly graduation ceremony.
Your experience is itself a confirmation of the complex world you’re entering.
We’re post-pandemic…
All you’ve ever known is a climate of political dysfunction.
Our economy is beset by inflation, and the cost of your education is staggering.
Climate change poses an existential threat.
War rages in the Middle East and Ukraine.
And whether the benefits of artificial intelligence outweigh the potential harm is subject to robust debate.
That’s a lot.
And still, none is the most important challenge we face as Americans.
Instead, it’s the fraying of our national fabric. We’ve been told so often that our differences define us that we are starting to act like it.
And we can’t count on politicians to provide us with the necessary leadership. They’re a large part of the problem. Like media influencers, the status quo is well suited to their self-preservation, not ours.
This polarization has been building for a while but was made worse by that which is oddly often labeled “connectivity.”
Instead, technology has disconnected us.
Don’t get me wrong, like you, I’m dependent upon Google, Uber, Waze, and Open Table.
But we’re spending too much time staging our lives for digital sharing without experiencing them shoulder-to-shoulder in real time.
Speaking of which, I’ve been a guest of Bill Maher on several occasions. He ends each show with a pithy, often ribald commentary. Well, two years ago, he said something that stuck with me.
“Our real division isn’t between red and blue; it’s between the people on both sides who aren’t willing to mingle with Americans outside their political tribe, so they have no idea what they’re really like.”
So true.
As Bill Bishop noted in his book “The Big Sort,” the internet has made it too easy to spend time among the like-minded and segregated from contrary opinions as well as those who hold them.
What we lack most is the common experience of the sort our parents often enjoyed and our grandparents took for granted.
Places where we can congregate and commune with people of diverse interests, backgrounds, and perspectives.
Robert Putnam saw the demise of what he called “social capital” coming in 2000 when he published the book “Bowling Alone.” He was referencing the glue that binds our communities and, hence, the nation.
When those bonds don’t exist, we’re not there to help one another, and the less fortunate suffer the most. Economist Raj Chetty’s research proved that.
He showed that cross-class friendships have a stronger impact than school quality, family structure, job availability, or even a community’s racial composition.
The people you know open up opportunities, and the growing class divide in the United States closes them off.
All this division, enabled by technology, has been linked to an alarming spike in mental health problems faced by your generation in particular.
Surgeon General Vivek Murthy has called loneliness the “crisis of our time.”
The good news is that we’re not as divided as you’ve been led to believe. Data shows we still hold core American values in common. There’s been no monumental shift in our issue positions in the last half-century.
It’s time for a national coming together. We have to surrender our superficial differences and re-establish social and economic connectedness.
So, as you embark on careers, please give added consideration to citizenship.
Ask yourself how will you serve your neighborhood and nation.
Maybe volunteer work.
Or supporting youth athletics.
Student exchange programs.
Become a big brother or big sister, or otherwise, figure out how you can be a mentor.
Don’t discount organized religion if you are a person of faith, whatever that faith might be.
Support local media.
The opportunities are unlimited.
Here’s one more book recommendation.
“The Good Life”.
It details a multi-generational study that began in 1938 and continues today.
Every two years, the participants have to answer lengthy, intrusive questionnaires.
Every five years, they surrender their medical records.
And every fifteen years, they are interviewed face-to-face.
The goal? To unlock the age-old question of what makes a good life.
So, what did the researchers learn?
Well, some surveys today say your generation has aspirations of being rich… and famous.
That’s understandable.
But neither is the key to a good life.
Instead, the key to a good life is “social fitness!”
Good relationships keep us happier, healthier and help us live longer.
People most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest mentally and physically at 80.
Building meaningful, satisfying personal relationships is in your best interest… and that of the nation.
When we’re together, we tell each other our life stories. We practice empathy, we build connections, and we strengthen our social fitness.
And we build the foundation to solve the significant problems we face as citizens.
Dickinson College Class of 2024 and all other graduates, go forth and mingle!
